How to Exasperate Your Wife and Other Short Essays for Men

(12 reviews)

Douglas Wilson


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Book details

Douglas Wilson is a pastor in Moscow, Idaho, a father of three, and grandfather of seventeen. He is the author of numerous books, including Decluttering Your Marriage, Future Men, and How to Exasperate Your Wife.

AUTHOR: Douglas Wilson

PAGE COUNT: 106 pages

SIZE: 5x8"

BINDING: Paperback

ISBN-10: 1591281806

ISBN-13: 9781591281801

PUB. DATE: February 24, 2015

Media: Paperback


"Marriage is not a vending machine, and love is not two quarters to put into it. It's a manner of life, not an exchange of commodities. So what does it look like when a man loves a woman?"

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Douglas Wilson answers that question in How To Exasperate Your Wife and Other Short Essays for Men, and his responses are as wide-ranging and humorous as they are incisive and down to earth. He explains why men's distorted view of wisdom handicaps their understanding of their wives, and he exposes rigid (and wrong) approaches to marriage and relationships. He gives practical advice for identifying unhappy households ("Mom is ignored") and replacing abdicating dads with true leaders ("Measure strength not in decibels but performance"), all combined with hot tips on how to exasperate your wife (you may start with leopard underwear).

Both realistic and insightful, How to Exasperate Your Wife and Other Short Essays for Men points husbands (and wives) towards a passionate married love that is particular, sacrificial, sacramental, and muy caliente.

You can purchase this as an audiobook here or on Audible.*

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What People Are Saying:

"Wilson has no footnotes. His work was not published simultaneously in German, English, French, Italian, and Spanish (as Eleven Cardinals Speak was). He pastors a few hundred people, not hundreds of thousands like the cardinal archbishops. But his parting advice is more helpful than the ruminations of the cardinals. In response to the husband who asks, 'What do I do if I don’t understand my wife?' Wilson says, 'God didn’t tell you to understand her. He said to love her. Try starting with that.'" -Caleb Nelson, World magazine

Reader Reviews:

"I came away challenged by Scripture to make many changes in my role as husband. Wilson's clear writing pointed me to many areas in my life where I am 'found wanting' and in significant need of improvement." ~ Isaiah

"As a woman reading this book, I felt *loved* to catch a closer scriptural glimpse of how God views women, and who He intends them to be for His Glory. Humor and wit disarm the reader, punchlined with practical and spiritual advice that is difficult to ignore. Short, memorable read." -Sarah Joy

"My wife laughs whenever I tell her I am reading this book." -Tyler

Customer Reviews

Based on 12 reviews

I loved the cover and anticipated equally humorous contents inside, intermingled with the truths of Scripture, however the contents, while true and important, didn’t grab one’s attention like I’d imagined it would. It’s easy enough to read (I read 45 pages in 30 minutes with decent retention), but I’m not excited about reading the last bit. I’ll still pass it on to my adult sons for their wives’ benefits.

Lewis O.

Highly recommended, every man should read this. If every woman read this as well, we'd all benefit well from it.

Reassuring and Redemptive

Confirms my belief that I have been exasperating my wife for years!

This book will bear witness with most *honest* men and gives insightful observations and suggestions to be less exasperating. Nicely done.

Complimentarianism explained

Gave this book to many people to help explain complimentarianism and how it functions. Best resource for that I've found. Wilson's advice for the porn addict in his letter was note worthy.


One of the best books I've read on marriage for men to date, and I've read a lot of them in the past year or so.


How to Exasperate Your Wife and Other Short Essays for Men

Dalton S.
Easy read and yet profound insights

I bought a copy of this book for every man at our church! An easy read and yet there were so many profound insights to keep reflecting upon.

Frances R.

Loved it

Thoughtful and provocative.

As a young man entering his first serious relationship, and one of millions of other YouTube students of Jordan Peterson's Biblical lecture series, I found the essays in this book both insightful and practical. If I wish to live in a culture more actively informed by biblical ideas, then I am called to do as Christ did and lead by example in all aspects of my relationships - personal and professional. Thank you for writing this book.

Pastor S.C.
A Manly Exhortation

The truth is found in this book based on scripture’s principles. The style is not for for everyone but the content is. If you can appreciate creative similes, sarcasm, and satire this will be fun a fun and helpful read.

All of Christ for All of Life

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